As agencies launch another major investigation, officials create a new department dedicated to translating common sense into government language. Read More.
After another campaign implosion, party leaders reportedly unveil a new screening process to ensure future scandals are discovered before Election Day. Read More.
A new fictional smartphone app instantly notifies voters whenever a Republican speaks, ensuring "fascism" is never more than one notification away. Read More.
Global leaders unveil a revolutionary “temporary peace subscription,” complete with auto-renewing conflicts and optional diplomacy upgrades. Read More.
After another court clash over executive authority, Washington agencies reportedly begin panic-buying pocket Constitutions they never planned to open. Read More.
French officials reportedly discover U.S. freedom is responsible for rising temperatures, while thermostats rush to enroll in climate sensitivity classes. Read More.
After another high-profile Supreme Court ruling, advocacy groups reportedly insist reality itself must undergo mandatory sensitivity training. Read More.
