Articles

FTX CEO Sam Bankman-Fried was seen doing vocal warmups and rehearsing his lines for his upcoming show trial in front of the House Financial Services Committee. The disgraced crypto mogul was overheard saying, "Unique New York, unique New York, I need, I know, unique New York," in an attempt to prepare for his performance in front of his good friend, Rep. Maxine Waters. Read More.

“Successful candidates” for an economics professor job at a Toronto public university must “self-identify as Black of African Descent,” according to the school’s listing for the position. Read More.

The news broke Monday evening that Sam Brinton, the gender-fluid, in-your-face, puppy-playing Deputy Assistant Secretary for Spent Fuel and Waste Disposition in the Office of Nuclear Energy in the Department of Energy, has finally been fired. Read More.

Following the news that Bernie Sanders was considering a 2024 presidential run, Hillary Clinton consulted the Ghost of Campaigns Past to inquire if she should dust off her old 2016 campaign posters. Read More.

Students at Dartmouth College are demanding a number of benefits, including an increased minimum wage of $21 per hour for campus jobs to $27 per hour for late-night shifts, including for those who work at a campus coffee shop. Read More.

Old Joe Biden is 80 now, and even after the Democrats’ triumphant (albeit highly suspicious) showing in the midterms, some on the Left still believe that the foggy-minded old liar is well past his sell-by date. Read More.

In a shocking sports news story, the White House announced that all-star center for the Phoenix Mercury, Brittney Griner was traded for a hall-of-fame Russian weapons dealer, Viktor Bout. Read More.

Liberal and tolerant Public Health™ experts seem to have finally sussed out, based on hard clinical research, the true sources of LGBTQ+++™ youth suicidality. Read More.

While 87 percent of students said that college is “too difficult,” the same percentage are studying less than 10 hours per week, a new survey found. Read More.

God released a press statement on Monday after watching a children’s drag show in Portland, Oregon. “In my omniscient opinion, humanity is not yet ready for the second coming of my son, Jesus Christ.” The Lord Almighty condemned the practice of sexualizing children in the name of “social equity” and “tolerance”. Read More.

Happy Thursday, dear Kruiser Morning Briefing friends. Lillian is currently undergoing therapy to deal with her long-held belief that all helicopters have spy tech that enables pilots to see her in the shower. Read More.

A record number of college students reported fear of sharing an opinion in the classroom that might differ from their peers, according to the William F. Buckley, Jr. Program’s eighth annual survey. Read More.

Hunter Biden’s crack pipe made headlines this morning when it officially filed for a restraining order against the President’s estranged son. Read More.

Who needs the Babylon Bee when we have the Washington Post? Read More.

Harvard University’s Agassiz Theater this week debuted a “heretical gay” biblical-based musical about Judas falling in love with Jesus Christ. Read More.