Washington, DC - During an all-presidents round of the popular board game, Risk, former president Barack Obama yelled, “yes! I’ve always wanted to invade South America! Take that Sleepy Joe!” as he moved his toy soldiers to the South American continent.
“Hey, I was planning a campaign in Central America, you can’t do that!” protested Joe Biden as he banged his fist down on the coffee table, knocking over a can of Diet Dr. Pepper in the process.
“Come on Sleepy Joe,” said Jimmy Carter, “everyone knows you didn’t stand a chance against Obama. It’s in his DNA to invade underdeveloped nations. He’s a pro at this.” At publishing time Obama was observed invading Central Asia while bemoaning the fact that the board game doesn’t involve drone strikes.
“It just doesn’t feel the same if I can’t endanger the lives of innocent civilians, I don’t want to play anymore guys,” said Obama. "I'm going home to watch drone strike footage and curl up in Michelle's big strong arms."
