In a shocking act of thought crime, Governor Gavin Newsom just accidentally agreed with reality—and now California’s liberals are clutching their non-binary pearls.
During a chat with conservative Charlie Kirk (already a hate crime), Newsom admitted that letting biological males dominate women’s sports might be—brace yourself—unfair. The horror! The betrayal! His handlers are still rebooting his programming.
Progressives are in meltdown mode. “Does he even GO here anymore?” sobbed an anonymous Berkeley professor between bites of an all-organic, oppression-free kale wrap. Activists are scrambling to excommunicate Newsom from Woke Church, while CNN analysts speculate he was possibly under duress—perhaps kidnapped by logic.
Conservatives, meanwhile, are horrified to find themselves nodding along with Newsom. “We never thought we’d see the day,” muttered a confused Republican strategist. “What’s next, AOC buying a gas stove?”
One thing’s for sure: Newsom better start groveling FAST—or risk being the first Democrat canceled for telling the truth.
