LIBERALS MELT DOWN OVER LAW ENFORCEMENT
Kristi Noem celebrates the milestone. Democrats scream that “arresting murderers is racist.” Nancy Pelosi allegedly demanded every deportee get a stimulus check for “emotional damages.”
AOC CALLS FOR “HUGS, NOT HANDCUFFS”
In a tearful livestream, AOC insisted gang members were just “undocumented entrepreneurs in community redistribution.” She suggested replacing ICE with “therapists on scooters.”
NEWSOM DECLARES LOS ANGELES “DEPORTATION-FREE ZONE”
Governor Newsom announced a plan to re-import criminals to maintain “California’s cultural crime balance.” Rumor says he’s drafting a bill making MS-13 the official state choir.
TRUMP DELIVERS RESULTS, DEMS DELIVER EXCUSES
While Trump protects families, Democrats mourn the loss of taxpayer-funded freeloaders. As Noem put it: “Precious lives saved. Families protected.” MAGA laughs last—again.
