Peace Breaks Out, Media Declares It A Hate Crime
At a private dinner that was “coincidentally” swarmed by every camera this side of CNN’s therapy department, Netanyahu stunned the room by handing Trump a Nobel nomination letter. Trump was touched. The press was triggered.
12-Day War Ends, Libs Demand 12-Day Mourning Period
Trump, architect of the Abraham Accords and now peace with Iran, did the unthinkable — he made peace without apologizing for America. Democrats immediately proposed sanctions on Netanyahu for “meddling in our narrative.”
Fake Experts Furious Nobel Not Going To Climate Alarmists
Progressive Twitter exploded. One verified PhD in “Feelings and Feminism” said, “This is white colonialism disguised as diplomacy!” Meanwhile, John Kerry lit a candle and held a vigil for the Paris Agreement.
Trump Responds With Trademark Humility
“This is the greatest honor since I brought back the McDonald’s McRib,” Trump beamed. “I’ve brought peace, jobs, and now possibly a shiny medal. Sorry losers!”
America First, Nobel Next
In the end, it’s simple: Trump stopped wars, made friends, and left the woke crowd crying in their oat milk. MAGA delivers — again.
