National Art Museum, Washington, DC - “How do you feel when you see something beautiful and priceless being destroyed?” asked a climate change activist on Tuesday after gluing their forehead to Almond Blossoms, a priceless Van Gogh painting. “Why don’t you care about the harm being done to our plane- wait where are you going?!” the same activist continued as museum security announced that they would leave the activists to rot where they stood.
“Yea, this is like the fourth one this week,” museum security officers said as they shrugged their shoulders. “We’ve adopted a new policy of just letting them rot on the paintings instead of making a big scene of it.”
“How am I going to use the bathroom?” the same activist asked as sweat poured down his face. “I have my niece’s ballet recital this afternoon, you have to get me un-stuck to this painting!” Museum guests began taking selfies with the activists shortly after they glued their heads to the paintings. “Apparently this is a new exhibit, I don’t know, art is getting pretty wild these days,” one guest said upon viewing the climate demonstration.
