Los Angeles, CA - At the fourth annual Climate Posturing Summit, where the world’s elite gather to scold Americans about their “outrageous” energy consumption, multiple activists advocated for limiting the travel abilities of middle class Americans. “We believe that, if every person does their part, we can save the world from armageddon in the next 50 years,” said one activist while walking down the steps of their private jet.
“I know some people aren’t ready to restrict their travel to one road trip in an electric vehicle per year, but we’re all going to need to make sacrifices,” another activist said in between mouthfuls of caviar.
“Most importantly, Americans should consider only watering their grass once a month and not running their A/C in the summer,” said the same activist. “Don’t forget to eat bugs!” chimed in another climate champion. “Of course, these rules apply exclusively to the middle class, the poor, and Republicans… we’ve already donated to Greenpeace, so we’re good.”