Ukraine's Acting Life Coach Gives Russia a 12-Step Program for Not Being Russia

  • by:
  • Source: Breitbart
  • 07/31/2025

Zelensky Delivers Message of Peace by Calling for Total Overthrow of Foreign Government

Broadcasting live from Kyiv’s newest fallout shelter and powered by an emotional support ring light, Zelensky insisted the only path to peace was for everyone to join hands, sing Kumbaya, and help him stage a geopolitical coup in Moscow.

Technical Difficulties Not the Only Glitch in Zelensky's Transmission

The OSCE livestream was plagued by static, lag, and whatever demon possesses Windows 95, but Zelensky’s words were crystal clear: “Change the regime! Preferably before lunch!” Audience members mistook it for a pitch for his new Netflix war docuseries.

Russia Accused of Temporal Crimes, Believing It’s Still 1853

Zelensky declared that Russia was mentally trapped in “another era,” possibly the Jurassic, or at least the Cold War. He added, “They think their borders are wherever they want! Like Amazon Prime, but with tanks.”

Europe Asked to Join in Global Therapy Session for Russia

He insisted the way to protect Europe was through mandatory mental health reform in Moscow. “We must talk to them like adults. By overthrowing their government and replacing it with one I like.”

TRUMP TO ZELENSKY: STAY IN YOUR LANE, BRO

In a follow-up post on Truth Social, President Trump quipped, “Zelensky wants regime change? He should start by changing his internet provider. Maybe then people would take his Xbox diplomacy seriously.”


This content is a work of satire and parody. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. Any opinions expressed in this content do not reflect the views of the author or publisher. In fact, they probably reflect the opposite of the views of the author or publisher. The purpose of this content is to entertain and possibly make you question the reality of the world around you. So please, don't take anything too seriously, unless it's the importance of a good laugh.
President Trump and Zelenskyy of Ukraine by Joyce N. Boghosian is licensed under White House White House
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