A brand-new poll out just before turkey-leftovers season shows a shocking — or maybe not so shocking — result: a majority of likely voters under 40 say they’d like to see a “Democratic Socialist” win the next presidential election.
It’s a bold generation with bold tastes: fewer student loans maybe, universal healthcare, maybe free college… and who knows, maybe free electricity too — once the pipelines and data centers finally finish building.
The pollsters sheepishly admit that “Democratic Socialist” is a fuzzy phrase — especially with all the “democratic” and “socialist” bits compiled together. But when you rebrand “tax-and-spend leftism” as “progressive fairness,” it’s practically a couture political endorsement.
One Gen-Z respondent reportedly said, “I’m tired of working just to afford ramen and rent — if socialism means free stuff, sign me up.” Another added, “As long as my student debt’s forgiven and I get my avocado toast, who cares about inflation?”
Conservative commentators were quick to point out the math doesn’t add up. One pundit quipped: “This is like asking people whether they’d like free puppies — sure, until they remember puppies poop, they need food, and eventually get expensive.”
Of course, the real irony is that many of these same voters will eventually grunt at higher taxes, slower growth, and government red tape — but by then, the poll results will be old news and dinner-table arguments will be trending instead.
Final Punchline: So enjoy the dream while it lasts, LinkedIn influencers! Because the only thing more inflationary than rising prices might be soaring idealism — funded, of course, by someone else’s wallet.
