Intro: Big Idea, Bigger Tweet
Trump Said The Move Would Save Money And Let Managers “Properly Run” Things, Which Is To Say: Less Excel, More Executive Time.
The China Flex
He Quoted China’s 50–100 Year Management Vision Like A Business Guru With A Stopwatch.
SEC On Speed Dial
The SEC Announced It’s “Prioritizing” The Request — Translation: Someone Brought Donuts.
Been There, Tweeted That
Trump Reminded Everyone He Asked The SEC To Study This In 2018, Proving Great Ideas Age Like Fine Tapeworms.
Conclusion: Freedom From Quarterly Terror
Semiannual Reports: More Long-Term Thinking, Fewer Earnings Freakouts — And A Nation That Finally Lets CEOs Breathe. MAGA, Longer-Term, Better Business.
— Parody based on reporting from Fox Business.
