Comey Gets Crabby With Cryptic Code
James “Deep Sea” Comey allegedly stumbled across 8647 perfectly shaped shells and thought, “Why not form a coded assassination threat against a former president?” Just another day in Democrat Beach Arts & Crafts. He later claimed he was “just feeling whimsical.” Sure, Jim. And Hillary was “just clearing her inbox.”
Sea Shells, Signals, And Sedition
For normal humans, “86” means remove. “47” is Trump. But for Comey? It was “a beautiful natural arrangement.” That’s right — the man who once ran the FBI can’t identify the international symbol for “get rid of Trump.” Next, he’ll say the shells formed “Epstein Didn’t Kill Himself” by accident too.
Deep State Or Deep Surf?
Democrats rushed to defend Comey’s art therapy moment. AOC claimed, “It’s shell sovereignty — you wouldn’t understand.” Meanwhile, Gavin Newsom declared beaches a “Free Speech Tide Zone” and announced a $40M program to train progressive lifeguards in Morse code.
Comey Retreats To Shoreline Denial
After public backlash (and possibly a few knocks from the Secret Service), Comey deleted the post and replaced it with an apology: “Sorry if my decorative clams suggested coastal terrorism.” Rumors say he’s now working on a seaweed collage spelling “Oops.”
Make Sand Great Again
As Comey buries himself in embarrassment and Pelosi orders starfish to spell out “Impeach Again,” one thing is clear — Trump lives rent-free in Democrat heads, beachfront and beyond. In 2024, the tide won’t just turn. It’ll tsunami straight into the White House.
