Just in time for stuffing and post-football comas, the woke left has bestowed upon America a brand new tradition: mourning at Thanksgiving. Yes, the same holiday Americans associate with gratitude, turkey, and tacky sweater vests is now apparently a somber wake — according to educators and activists.
Naturally, the forces of moral clarity came out swinging — because stuffing a turkey and thanking God for our blessings is just too wholesome. Instead, we should reflect on systemic oppression, historical guilt, and trauma — never mind that most attendees just wanted a second helping of mashed potatoes.
One proudly announced: “We can’t celebrate when there’s still injustice in the world.” Another chimed in: “Thanksgiving should be a time to mourn for oppressed peoples … not to binge-eat.” And somewhere a cranberry sauce wept.
Of course, if the left gets its way, 2025 will go down in history as the year turkey got canceled. And the only thing stuffed after the meal will be guilt.
Punchline: Because nothing says “diverse, inclusive society” like extinguishing joy and replacing it with regret — one bland casserole at a time.
