Blessed Are The Dealmakers! Trump Ends War, Requests Nobel, And Also A Trophy Dog

by: Editor-in-Chief
Oct. 09, 2025
Source: Blaze Media
10/09/2025

President Donald Trump by Daniel Torok is licensed under White House White House

Trump Pulls Peace Out Of A Hat

Putting Doubters To Shame, He Presents A 21-Point Plan And A Matching Tie. Trump Declares “Blessed Are The Peacemakers!” And Also “Blessed Are The People Who Clap On Cue.”

The Hostage Exchange (And Photo Op)

Hostages To Be Exchanged Within 72 Hours, Cameras To Be Exchanged Within 7 Minutes. Sources Say Trump Demanded A Group Shot With Every Released Person Holding A Signed Copy Of The Plan.

International Leaders React With Polite Awe

Netanyahu Calls It A Turning Point, European Diplomats Call It “Different,” And The Nobel Committee Calls Their Office To Check If They Still Have The Same Envelope.

The Trophy Conclusion

War Ends, Stat Sheets Improve, And Trump Reminds Everyone That If You Want Peace, You Send A Negotiator — And Also Possibly A Press Release. Long Live The Deal, Long Live The Selfie.

Note: Inspired By Reporting On The Recent Gaza Deal And The Surrounding Press Storm.

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