Articles

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Tulsi Gabbard Declares War On Swamp Spies: ODNI Staff Told To Pack Their Espresso Machines
Tulsi Gabbard takes a flamethrower to Washington’s spy swamp, leaving Democrats clutching their pearls and their soy lattes. Read More.
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Trump To Review All 55 Million Visa Holders: Democrats Demand Amnesty For “Tourists With Terrorist Vibes”
Trump announces review of 55 million visa holders for security threats. Democrats panic, insisting “overstaying a visa while running a cartel is basically a cultural exchange.” Read More.
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Trump Prepares To Smack Putin With Sanctions So Hard, Russia Might Finally Join The EU Just To Stop The Pain
Sen. Lindsey Graham, America’s loudest war clarinet, insists Trump is about to crush Russia’s economy unless Putin grabs a photo op with Zelensky. Moscow, meanwhile, yawns. Read More.
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Microsoft Copilot Declared Honorary Member Of Chinese Communist Party After Perfectly Reciting Propaganda
A shocking new report reveals America’s top AI models aren’t just woke — they’re practically waving little red flags and singing karaoke to Mao’s Greatest Hits. Read More.
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Trump Promises No Boots On the Ground in Ukraine, Sends Pelosi’s Heels Instead
Trump told Fox News there will be zero U.S. boots in Ukraine, sparking panic among Euro-globalists who just realized they’ll have to fight their own wars without American footwear. Read More.
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GE Appliances Spends $3 Billion To Prove Trump Was Right Again
GE Appliances, owned by China’s Haier, just pledged $3 billion in U.S. factories thanks to Trump’s tariffs—proving once again that America First beats latte-sipping socialism every time. Read More.
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Trump’s ‘Very Good, Early Step’ Makes Democrats Panic That Peace Might Break Out
Trump hosts Zelenskyy, calls Putin, and suddenly peace talks are on the table—sending Democrats into hysterics because nothing terrifies them more than Trump solving problems they’ve milked for years. Read More.
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House Oversight Asked for Dirt, Got Nothing—but at Least Barr Showed Up
Former Attorney General William Barr testified in a closed House Oversight Committee hearing on Jeffrey Epstein’s death. Barr denied any Trump ties, while Rep. James Comer accused Democrats of politicizing the probe. The hearing kicks off a series of high-profile depositions scheduled through October. Read More.
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Appeals Court Gives Trump Green Light To Turn CFPB Into Chuck E. Cheese
A federal appeals court ruled that Trump can resume mass firings at the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, triggering panic among bureaucrats who suddenly realized they might have to get real jobs. Read More.
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Putin Proposes "Buy One, Get One Free Alaska Deal" At Trump Summit
Putin’s latest summit with Trump in Alaska devolved into a bizarre pitch for trade deals, Arctic real estate, and possibly a new Trump Tower: Siberia Edition. Democrats immediately collapsed into panic mode, demanding sanctions on snowflakes. Read More.
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Trump Given Green Light To Fire Jerome Powell With “Extreme Prejudice” Clause
House Republicans move to fast-track President Trump’s dream of turning the Federal Reserve into the Federal Tremble, starting with Powell’s pink slip. Read More.
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Trump Brings Tariffs, Territory Swaps, and Moose Diplomacy to Alaska Summit
In a move blending tough diplomacy with classic Trump flair, the 45th President is heading to Alaska to meet Putin — armed with tariffs, sanctions, and an unshakable belief that Russia blinks first. Read More.
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Trump Declares D.C. “Crime Disneyland,” Promises To Replace Mayor With Actual Sheriff
In a bold move, Trump seized control of Washington D.C.’s police, deploying the National Guard and terrifying every latte-sipping progressive from Capitol Hill to Whole Foods. Read More.
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Trump Warns Putin: “Stop Or I’ll Sanction Your Vodka With Capri Sun”
After telling Putin “there will be very severe consequences” if Russia doesn’t end the Ukraine war, Trump faces backlash from Democrats, media, and possibly the International Missile Sensitivity Alliance. Read More.
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Trump And Putin Schedule Peace Talk, Accidentally Leave Out Guy Involved In War
Trump and Putin are meeting in Alaska to “end the war.” Ukraine was not invited, because apparently peace talks work best when you leave out the country being invaded. Read More.
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